Do You Just Hate It When People Are Like This?
When you work so hard for something someone else just goes out and gets it?
My neighbors are just like that. She’s a stay at home mom, he’s an insurance agent. Live in a 1.5mil house (their parents bought for them) drive expensive cars (each have 2) own a boat and a nice RV. They all wear Nordstrom clothes, and spend like $500 on shoes.
It just makes me sick that they can have so much, but we have 2 incomes. Paying the mortgage, struggling to save money for my college fund and have to pull $200,000 out of our rears for a major house remodel in order to get out from under it.
How do they do it?
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Everyone, including me, is envious sometimes. I just try to remind myself that I don’t know what their life is like outside of material possessions. They could be very unhappy, abusive, dysfunction, etc. Once I remind myself of that the envy tends to go away. I’d rather be part of a hard-working, loving, middle class family than have money.
A lot of people would be sickened by that, but rather than dwell, just remind yourself about the good things you have.
why don’t you ask them? they could have some great budgeting tips for you.
on the other side of the coin they could be just a tiny step from going bankrupt and losing everything. Most of the ‘beautiful people’ are- I know a very large number of people who live in fancy houses and drive brand new fancy cars that are almost invariably struggling to put food on the table. The wealthiest people I know live in hovels in one of the poorest parts of the country, drive rusty old bombs and look like welfare bludgers.
They may have a silver spoon in their mouths, but you have one thing they will never have – that indescribably amazing feeling of having earnt and worked for what you have. You don’t need a flash life to be happy. Personally I’d choose a humble life that I can appreciate over a glitzy life in which I have no sense of value any day.
I was always told that people that have the most “stuff” have the most debt! Wouldnt you rather buy clothes at target or have a second hand car than have piles of debt?
So?
I have to admit, the fact that their parents are the ones giving it to them is a little weird.
But I don’t subscribe to the crabs in a bucket line of thought.
If someone earns it (obviously these people didn’t, if you have your story straight), why shouldn’t they enjoy it the way they please?
I make good money and have a very nice home, nice things, and I take fun vacations and can afford that life. I’m sure there’s quite a few people that ‘hate’ me for that, but you know what? I let em and I don’t care. If they spent less time stewing in resentment, maybe they could move themselves up in the world.
If someone is doing better than me, I don’t think about how much I resent that; I study them and figure out what they’re doing right, then I try and put that into action in my own life. It’s far more productive than ranting to YA.
Maybe you should stop focusing on what your neighbours have and try to reign in your jealousy. It’s not attractive in the least.
Their home is paid for. You’d be amazed what you can do if you aren’t paying a mortgage. That’s why I bought a house I could afford and focused on paying my house down. I am not blowing thousands of dollars on interest annually. I paid off my 15 year mortgage in 12 years, which was good because I was laid off and then became disabled not long after that. Imagine, if I hadn’t paid for the house, I would have lost it along with all those payments I had already made on the house (since you are primarily paying interest). I had one unspectacular income, but I worked a second job for 3-4 months a year and EVERY PENNY went to pay off the house.
You chose to have a major house remodel. They chose to buy an RV and cars.
Well, their parents bought it for them.
My parents have never done anything that massive for me, they can’t afford to, and we have lived on the edge from the beginning. We are well below our state’s poverty line, and yet can’t get real aid. we are one paycheck away from being homeless.
You can remodel a house?
You have a college fund?
You have two steady incomes?
You are lucky. We are living in an apartment with no working stove, driving a 30 year old car that you have to hot wire, and will be celebrating my son’s first birthday in a homeless shelter. WE have worked our entire lives, and everything was yanked away and now we are stuck with my husband delivering pizza and me doing other people’s housework, and still the ends don’t meet. I would sell my soul to have what you have, who cares what your neighbors are doing?
Feel better?
Jealous much? Why do you care what they have or how they got it? How does it directly affect you? Right, it doesn’t, so you need to worry about yourself and your family, not theirs. You said you work and try to save, therefore you have something to be proud of. Do not let your life pass you by while you covet your neighbor’s belongings. Be thankful for what you do have – your kids, your husband and your happiness. No one else can make you happy, for that you are solely responsible, so I suggest you get to it. Trust me, life is too short to be jealous about the neighbor’s boat.
What’s with the thumbs down? Seriously? Because I didn’t pacify someone’s ridiculous rant about the neighbor who has more? I would be ashamed to post something so self-centered and pathetic! Get a life!
EDIT to poster:
Let me make this clear for you. When you have to come and purchase casket for your 5 year old, then you can look for and expect sympathy over your neighbor’s boat. Do you really think that your money woes and jealousy of your neighbor can even come close to comparing to having to bury your own child?
My point is this: Things could be much, much worse than the lack of a college fund, so stop being so unbelievably ungrateful. I witness these kind of sad, heart wrenching, unimaginable things on a daily basis, therefore I GUARANTEE that the fact that the neighbor has clothes from Nordstrom and you don’t is nothing but shameful, pathetic and ridiculous display of your unending ignorance.
No it doesn’t. There are people in Africa who don’t have anything. There are women and children in Iraq who are watching their husbands die in car bombs and being terrorized by American soliders! There are children dying of malnutrition, AIDs and diseases in Africa! The poor people matter more to me than wealth or luxeries. I know what it like to middle class and I know what it is like to be poor. My husband and I were poor until this year. We are $2,000 above the 2009 federal poverty line. I would rather be poor than rich. I could care less about wealth or being rich.
Hate is a strong word that should be used for people you truly want to take the energy to despise because their actions are so horrific and immoral. If you have so little going on that you hate a neighbor who hasn’t done anything to harm you, then you really need to rethink your life and find a way to make it more fulfilling. It’s incredibly narrow-focused and egocentric to whine about a family that has more than you do when there are over a billion people in the world who don’t even have access to clean drinking water. You are the one choosing to spend $200,000 on a home remodel. What gun is up to your head? Why is it any of your business how much money they spend on shoes? Why do you care?
If you have such a hard time dealing with your neighbor, never come to the Westside of LA where $1.5 million will get you a starter home as-is, even in today’s economy, and teenagers have $800 handbags. Their mom’s bags are often over $2000. I don’t see the point in it at all, but it doesn’t bother me how other people choose to spend their money. All that material wealth is just…….. material. Make your life truly have worth and value, and stop focusing on such petty nonsense.